I love snuggling up under a blanket on a cool night, or kicking off the covers when it’s warm, a breeze drifting over my bare legs. I love that first cup of tea after a long hard day, and how lovely clean, crisp sheets feel against my skin. I love the feeling of relief you get from finally being able to sneeze. I love books that make you want to cut yourself off from the world, that feeling of ‘just one more page’, of looking at the clock and realising it’s four in the morning. I love looking at the groom’s face as the bride walks in and seeing him tear up.
I love the smell of rain, and when it’s time again for big jumpers and hats and scarves, when leaves fall from the trees and crinkle under your feet. I love when it’s warm enough to just wear a t-shirt and not freeze. I love the realisation of who dunnit, and knowing all the words. I love baby shoes and socks and the idea that I could ever have been that tiny. I love the taste of milk straight from the carton and that licking the bowl is still the best part about baking.
I love when a favourite film comes on tv even though I have seen it a million times, and have it on DVD. I love the feel of brand new socks. I love that people I’ve known forever can still surprise me. I love getting a seat on the bus, feeling pink after being in the sun, and the smell of suntan lotion. I love mac and cheese and having toast or porridge for dinner, and having no one to tell me I shouldn’t. I love proper Sunday dinners with cauliflower cheese, roast potatoes and Yorkshire pudding. I love the feeling you get on Friday night when you know the whole weekend is ahead of you. I love being surrounded by friends who know all your embarrassing stories but don’t tell.
I love knowing my way around but still being able to get lost. I love when someone knows exactly what I’m thinking, just from a look. I love a good belly laugh that leaves you weak at the knees and gasping for air. I love finishing a book without breaking the spine. I love feeling tired to my bones because of things I have achieved. I love a loved one tickling my back, and not just so I’ll do theirs. I love being proud of myself for doing things alone.
I love my battered trainers that fit my feet like slippers and my ‘I Heart NY’ T shirt, even though it’s faded and covered in hair dye. I love when TV shows don’t play it safe. I love the way I can make babies laugh, and how they smell so lovely you wish you could bottle it for a time you feel blue. I love that moment just before I fall asleep, when all seems well and good. I love being the first person a friend tells their wonderful, life changing news to.
I love the heat coming off paper fresh from the photocopier. I love having my music on shuffle and being surprised at every song that comes on. I love being geeky and having someone get my film reference and smile. I love that it’s light out when I leave work right now. I love that I look good in hats. I love being lazy and not getting dressed until late in the afternoon. I love listening to a new song over and over because it’s just so good. I love a hand on the small of my back. I love reading old journals and seeing how silly I was, looking at old photos and realising I was happy and oh so dorky.
I’m learning to love my body, flaws and all, for how it is mine all mine. I love that my second toe is longer than the first, that dimple in my chin and weird extra bit on my bottom lip. I love the scars that show how clumsy I am. I love spending time in my own company, with no one else to enter my little world. I love spending time with friends, of letting them in, and of being let in.