I have had a very busy weekend, going home to Yorkshire on Friday afternoon, then to Manchester on Saturday for a birthday do, back to Barnsley on Sunday and today I will be dragging my butt back down to London. Although for now I am lolling about at Mum’s being harrassed by the dog because she simply cannot be loved enough and I have already had to give her a timeout on the step. Right now she’s basking in a sunspot so that’s keeping her quiet.
Manchester was quite good fun. We went to The Birdcage (sadly no Agador Spartacus to entertain us). About every 20 minutes or so there would be a mini show, where a drag act would come out and mime. They did Dreamgirls and the Spice Girls and Tina and Liza and Cher (my God we almost missed Cher! He came on as we were leaving. You can’t miss Cher!). He was good but did far too much gurning for my liking. Had he made funny faces every now and again I can imagine it would have been funny, but he just did it over and over and it was annoying me. The other dancers/acts were good though. The Posh Spice was scary like her, although very tall. The male dancers (as in, not in drag) were really giving it their all, it’s like ‘Ma! I’ve made it!’ Aww. I liked their crazy head dresses. The host was a fake Lily Savage, although he was so good I thought for a moment that the real Lily Savage had come out of retirement.
Also, The Birdcage is known as The Place for Hen Parties, and they’re not kidding. So many of them. Ones dressed as cowgirls, others pirates, and also keep fit ones with leg warmers and head bands, and gangsters. Ones with bunny ears and tails, ones with penises that flash on their heads, instead of bunny ears…and, I must say right now, for all who are listening, should I ever get married, anyone who makes me carry around a six foot inflatable penis on my hen do will be out of the wedding. No kidding. It must have been very offensive as the last time I saw it it was being carted off by security.
I don’t totally understand the toilets there though, they don’t have seats! Stainless steal with no seats! Also, one of the toilets (at least there were two so fewer queues) didn’t have a sink, it had some sort of fountain in the middle. It’s huge, but I still had to ask someone where the sinks were as I completely missed it. Stupid thing. And it didn’t have taps. Why do they have to be all fancy? And aren’t women annoying? In the other one I couldn’t get to the sink for all the bloody women standing doing their hair and make up. Not only that, when they were dancing the majority of them would stand at the front of the stage, jostling each other for room, their backs to their friends doing sexy ‘look at me, look at me!’ dancing. Sweetheart, this place is full of women and gay men, enough with the makeup and dancing, just have a good time with your mates already!
It was a laugh though, and we got to bed about 2/3ish, I dunno. I was pretty tired all day yesterday, so thankful I’m not working today. Bliss.